The Roronoas’

@#$% YOU MICRO$OFT!

@#$% you to @#$%. @#$% you! We did have it longer than most people that fried theirs, having bought it in December. We ventilated it with a fan constantly and all that. Took good care of it. But Zach managed to get the game I'd been waiting like, a year for today - Bioshock -- from Toys R Us (Toys R Us is possibly going to get sued for releasing it before the date they were supposed to, and fined $15,000 or so for every copy they sold. O__O). I was so happy. Here was the game I'd wanted to play forever...not to mention Beautiful Katamari coming soon, in a couple months.

The @#$% system had like, several games I played over the half a year or whatever. He's played tons. RIGHT when they start making games I wanna play Bioshock kills it. Really. I'd just hacked a bot and something else, getting 2 achievements...and the screen froze. Then when I rebooted we got THE RED RING OF DEATH.

@#$$%.

Micro$oft takes a couple weeks to send the box we have to mail it back in, and then a couple MONTHS to send us a "refurbished" one. -_- F- that. We pay $500 and this happens?! Plus at Microcenter we bought one of their plans because the dude said they'd fix it for us if we got the ring.

THEY LIED.

Zach called and they said nope. After the Xbox Warranty, then their plan goes into effect. The Xbox warranty is 3 f-ing years long. Gawd I hate this company. Why would you make a system that doesn't work and dies?!!! Why release it?!

Plus, even though we get a "refurbed" system, we won't get our old one back - and the LIVE things we PAID for (videos, games) won't work on a new console? The hard drives don't like new concoles? Is this what I hear? Holy @#$% ing @#$%!

Even as a child, Zoro was strong enough to defeat most adults. However, there was one person Zoro could not beat - his sensei's daughter, Kuina. After their 2000th fight Zoro challenged her in private for one more match - with real swords. He lost. The two make a promise - that either of them must become the worlds best swordsman. The next day, Kuina died falling down the stairs of her house. Zoro, remembering the promise, decided to fulfil it for both of them and he asked the teacher for Kuina's sword, Wadou Ichimounji. (Sometimes called Ghost.) He started to develop a new fighting style - santoryu (three-swords-style). Before her sudden death, Zoro fought with two swords but after her death, Zoro started using her sword as well, clenched in his mouth.

Zoro originally was a bounty hunter, with ambitions of becoming the greatest swordsman in the world. However a moment of kindness landed Zoro in trouble with Helmeppo, the wimpy son of the Marine captain Axe-Hand Morgan. Zoro joined Monkey D. Luffy's crew after being saved from execution by the Marines, and is now one of Luffy's "Straw Hat pirates". Holding on to his dream of becoming the greatest swordsman in the world he only joined Luffy to accomplish that goal, though Luffy doesn't mind - on the contrary, he only sees it natural that the greatest swordsman and the greatest pirate are on the same crew.

Elly is from my site, air-lobster.com. She is a nekomata: a creature from a Japanese superstition that a cat 10 years old would develop a split tail and magical powers. In many of my Lemonfingers pieces she's depicted as an espeon from Pokemon (an espeon resembles a nekomata).

SOMETIMES I WRITE TOO MUCH. And I don't always write erotica. Some of these pieces are simply romantic.

Elly Roronoa Sketchit (sometimes known as Sanji's Angel, previously known as L4J, maiden name Mango) is actually Michelle Taylor, a 30-something insane artist. I've always needed to rein in the obsessive compulsiveness I generate over the dear swordsman from One Piece. Drawing as well as writing these pieces keeps my mind more or less in check. I have many fanart sites but the ones I'm using right now are here and here.

I'm VERY possessive of the dear so don't start a fan girl fight okplzthnx.

I'm dyslexic. I tend to type quickly and reverse words when I'm excited, and despite frequent spell checks I often twist words around. Be kind if you find a mistake.

I don't really want in depth critiques on my work - technically I'm an artist, not a writer and I gave up editing my own pieces a long time ago. I can always find things wrong with them. So unless it's a major inconsistency or something you really wanna help me fix don't bother pointing it out. I say this because I write self-insert (what some unkind people refer to as Mary Jane or Mary Sue) stories and I get many flames because of that. Once my email and website were hacked by an entire gang of preteens. They were desperately trying to prove I was a pedophile and even tried to ask me out multiple times, baiting me. EW, okay? So yeah I'm married and not a dangerous pervert. Just a regular one.

The Fave List

Anime: ONE PIECE (Japanese please!)
Band: They Might Be Giants, Lifeseeker
Movie: Ghostbusters, Spaceballs
Food: Blood rare meat/sushi (seeing a trend)
Drink(s): Coffee, sake, beer, water
Game(s): Silent Hill (any), Dead Rising, Katamari
Forums: [link] :The Brig

My goodness. A defense of Mary Sue/Jane and Gary Stu characters? In a way, that is what this is. Well, my specific character anyway.

Wait.

Are you so biased that you can't read a single word further or are immediately seized with a compulsion to scan this page and find some literary faux pas to make fun of me? Do you feel an intense desire to email me and scream that all my work is 'Mary Sue', so I am automatically biased myself? I would suggest then, dear reader, that you calm yourself.

Take a few deep breaths.

Relax...

Are you better yet?

You sure?

If this tactic still hasn't worked after five full seconds perhaps you shouldn't read the rest of this. It would appear that you have some unnecessary anger against people that you don't even know.

As an artist that loves to read books of all genres I started writing self insert fiction at a very early age. I went through different series and genres of fandom and each created a specific persona that formed almost by herself for me to place inside that universe. I rarely like pairings within stories and television but usually fall for some character within each book, movie, or show I ingest. Placing myself in those fantasy worlds solved the jealousy problem immediately and provided a little haven for myself where I could be what I wanted to be. The writing felt good to get out of my system and in the early days before the internet was popular, I actually sold many of these fics in paper-bound form to Star Trek fans across the globe! It was fun and very profitable. I wouldn't do it now as I understand more about the legal rights of the creators of the series but as I said, I was young.

Eventually this person I created merged into one and became the 'Elly Sketchit' she is today. I give you one example why I write and draw the things I do: do you have a crush on some boy or girl you know? If not, you probably have at some point. Think back. Did you draw copious pictures and write stories about him/her kissing another girl/boy?

Why not?

Because it would have been silly, that's why. If you like a person, you dream of being with that person. If I have the talent to write and draw myself into a show I'm certainly going to do it rather than force my fictional man into another woman's arms. Or man's, for that matter.

Despite this Elly is not as solid a 'Mary Jane/Sue' character as one might think. After all, what is a Mary Sue? There are too many trains of thought on that. Do not assume that she is simply a person who "doesn't belong" in a fictional universe, made up by the author to resemble herself in every way and stroke her ego. Some of these characters are, I admit. But mine isn't.

If you describe an MS as "a character that is perfect", Elly is not. She has blamed the chemicals in her system one too many times, relying upon that as an excuse for her bad actions. She has forced herself out in conditions that stressed her mentally and physically, knowing that she would lose the children she was carrying. She is not, technically, a very nice lady, the product of what would really happen if someone lived with what she has been through. She did not "rise above it" in a "heroic, epic fashion" like the insipid MS pieces haters love to cite as examples. The stories in her Saga show her struggling to come to grips with herself. To be a typical MS, Elly would be beloved by all no matter what she did and would suffer only to be reconciled later and shown that everything "wasn't her fault". I intend to show that some of the results of her behavior and actions are indeed her problem. One can't hide from everything in life and she has done many terrible things.

If an MS to you is "a plain looking character beloved by everyone", she isn't that either. James is deluded (think young boy getting attached), Butch wants to possess her as an object and Tracey is just blown away by the whole deal. Gary can't stand her. Ash is disgusted by the whole idea, as is Misty, and Cassidy and Jesse are just as revolted. Not very many female characters like her, in fact, but not because she's "unbelievably beautiful". She's far too pale in her human form and doesn't have long, lustrous flowing locks of purest midnight, strawberry red or the sunniest blond. Women don't see why the men she's with stay with her. They think she's horrendously ugly both in mind and body. When the arc changes and Elly gets tossed into the ONE PIECE universe, Sanji originally thinks she's a monster and rushes off to fight her. Even her (much later on in the fics) romantic interest Roronoa Zoro, calls her ''stupid cat''. He doesn't fawn all over her and call her beautiful names. That isn't what his character is about.

Please do not judge all self insert pieces to be the same, jam them into one horrendous little ball and call them "Mary Sue". It's true that a lot of them are sad excuses of writhing teenage hormones and angst. But why do the people that don't like these types of pieces feel the need to slander others and create groups based against them? Why do you hate so much? If this offends you, you have a wonderful option: don't look. I don't hate you for thinking I'm some depraved idiot with minimal talent because I write and draw myself within an anime universe with a main character by my side. You have no reason to 'hate' me. There are far more people worthy of such a strong emotion that have murdered people and committed treacherous deeds. Hate is such a sterile, hurtful thing and it accomplishes nothing to scream and whine at each other. In essence you are proving yourselves as childish as the very people you attack for no good reason.

Put that passion into something worthwhile that will help others, not hurt them.